Today...

Current mood:contemplative

So today I took a step back...

So far back I actually remembered the time in my life when I felt the happiest!  I was barely 19 and had recently moved to this wonderful town of Pocatello.  I was living in a shit hole apartment that was WAY over priced for what was there.  This was the first time I had lived on my own.  I don't know how it was achieved but I always had a supply of good luck running in my direction.  I was going to school and, surprisingly enough, especially to myself, was ecstatic with the idea.  Life was so easy then.  I was broke but I loved the company I surrounded myself with. 

It is a nice dream to think those days would never end but at that moment in my life I never once thought it would ever be any different...

Strange what can happen in a few years...

Don't get me wrong, life isn't bad now by any means.  I just miss the innocence of being so young. 

Then it came to me... The happiest time in my life quickly became the saddest time in my life.  With one phone call my innocence of that time was shattered. 

I want to be over this by now... How do I let myself "forgive and forget" when I constantly remind myself of it???

If anyone even reads this stupid thing and has a magical answer that will take away all the shit please let me know...

Until then I'll be working on the todays.... instead of the yesterdays...